“Tibi Tendlu” blamed for rising sexual violence against girls in Africa
By Thokozani Mazibuko
The practice of keeping family problems hidden locally, referred to as “Tibi Tendlu” (literally, “dirt of the house”), is being blamed for the alarming rates of sexual abuse against young girls across Africa, with many perpetrators escaping justice due to underreporting.
The idiom, which discourages families from disclosing cases of abuse to authorities, has perpetuated a cycle of silence that leaves thousands of children vulnerable.
Experts and rights advocates say this silence emboldens perpetrators while denying victims the justice and support they deserve.
Communities across Eswatini and beyond acknowledge that many cases of incest, molestation, and sexual violence are treated as private family matters, hidden from law enforcement.
This cultural norm, while intended to preserve family dignity, has instead created an environment where abusers operate with impunity.
“Tibi Tendlu has resulted in thousands of African young girls being sexually abused and having their perpetrators go scot free without any justice,” said one gender rights activist, adding that the practice must be confronted through community dialogue and stronger legal safeguards.
The problem is not unique to Eswatini. A 2021 UNICEF report on Violence Against Children in Africa found that one in five girls on the continent experiences sexual abuse before the age of 18, yet fewer than 40% of these cases are ever reported to the police or child protection services.
The report further noted that cultural attitudes, including fear of stigma, pressure to preserve family honour, and mistrust of legal systems are major barriers to justice.
Similarly, the African Union’s 2023 Report on Child Protection highlighted that harmful cultural practices and community silence continue to undermine Africa’s commitments to children’s rights under the African Charter on the Rights and Welfare of the Child.
Survivors often carry the burden of shame while their abusers walk free. In many cases, victims are forced into silence by relatives who fear social disgrace more than they fear the law. This silence not only denies victims justice but also normalizes abuse, perpetuating trauma across generations.
“Families think they are protecting themselves from embarrassment,” explained a social worker in Manzini. “But in reality, they are protecting abusers while destroying the lives of innocent children.”
Child protection advocates are urging governments to strengthen community policing, empower traditional leaders to report cases, and provide safe spaces for children to disclose abuse without fear of reprisal.
They also stress the need for mass education campaigns to dismantle the harmful belief that family problems should remain private, especially when children’s lives are at stake.
“Silence is complicity,” said the African Child Policy Forum (ACPF) in its 2022 “Born to Suffer” Report, which emphasized that protecting children from abuse is a collective responsibility that must override cultural taboos.
As Eswatini and other African nations work toward building stronger child protection systems, rights groups warn that breaking the culture of Tibi Tendlu is essential. Reporting crimes, no matter how shameful they may seem, is the only way to ensure justice for victims and deterrence for perpetrators.
Until then, young girls across the continent will continue to face abuse in silence, while the phrase “Tibi Tendlu” remains a grim reminder of the cost of secrecy.